I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
