in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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