she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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