do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
We left the knife in your bed.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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