More tranny stories later!
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
