so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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