That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
only if we run a train.
done.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
