I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Randomize
