you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I got inside last night via doggy door
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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