mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
