I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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