too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
