My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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