"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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