he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
