Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
