Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Is it penis luge time yet?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
