kristin has been a bad kristin
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
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