dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize