At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize