ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
