We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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