no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
