I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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