just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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