am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
wow bdsm is so cute
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
