My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
