I will die if light touches me.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
P.S. I can't hear my feet
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
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