Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i used baking grease as lip gloss
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize