I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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