How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at templeย
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... ๐ฏ๐๐๐
Do I even want to know?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize