hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
