in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
