soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Randomize
