hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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