he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
