And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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