the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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