once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize
