so that wasnt chicken after all
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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