im drinking this country out of the recession.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
