Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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