I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
we made out on top of his cat.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
smell my finger.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
