hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Randomize
