Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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