Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
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