you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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