i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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