so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
The beer is more important than you right now.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
