I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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